God Delights in Me

I remember where I was when he rebuked me. We remember things like that—the place where you were changed. So I remember when the kind, pastoral rebuke with gentleness and unwavering commitment to God’s word came at me. I was going off (read “the highly unattractive quality of arrogantly complaining no matter how true said topic may be”) on the abundance of weak and fluffy material that is spoon-fed to women and how utterly stupid it was (because I was somehow sooo above it??) that women get high on being told they are the apple of God’s eye and “you are enough” and blah blah blah. That’s a conversation for another day because at that point in time, when I desperately clutched to my hot-headed knowledge, I had not yet experienced the darkened course of paranoia and anxiety—but sure is funny how the Lord humbles the proud isn’t it?

But when the steam subsided from my nostrils and the fire ceased spewing from my mouth, that’s when the arrow pierced this dragon’s scales. After he patiently endured my painful soliloquy and agreed with me far less than I had hoped, he started reciting verses that were engraved on his heart. Verses he has recounted to himself in times of his own deepest need, I’m quite sure of it.

Isaiah 62:4
Proverbs 8:30-31
Zephaniah 3:17

He pushed back hard and said that if anyone is in Christ, God does delight in them, because he delights in Christ (Isaiah 42). “God delights in himself and in all that reflects his character” (Systematic Theology, Grudem, 218).

I felt smaller and smaller the longer he talked. The painful reality of my own blinding ignorance.

So maybe it wasn’t the ‘delight’ in the way so many women’s curriculum denote—where sinfulness can be diminished and personal value apart from Christ tends to reign supreme—but nonetheless there remains the biblical truth I was blatantly ignoring—God does delight in me. Make no mistake believer, God delights in you and rejoices over you not because you are somehow deserving or have anything to offer, but because Christ is worth delighting in. God the Father delights in believers because He delights in His Son. When our faith alone rests in the person and completed work of Jesus, Christ imputes His own righteousness to us and now when God looks at us, He sees the perfect righteousness of His Son. “When we reflect his character, he delights in us and finds us beautiful in his sight,” (Grudem, 220) but God doesn’t just delight in us primarily because we now reflect all things excellent in Christ, but because He sees us as perfectly righteous (2 Cor 5:21, 1 John 3:1). We delight in God for he delights in the Son and we delight in Christ for saving helpless, hell-bent sinners which makes us aware of God’s delight in us as we are in Christ (Romans 5). And the delighting never ends as we behold His glory with unveiled faces (2 Cor 3:18).

It was a moment I will never forget, and I forget most things within a week. It’s where my pride was revealed and a softer heart was produced. I really don’t know a lot; certainly not as much as I thought I did. And I have (had?? by God’s grace) a tendency to “always be up on arms about something” (Mel, Parks and Rec). But this isn’t the way of Christ. This isn’t what the Lord delights in. This is not a reflection of God’s beauty.

And so I can rightly mourn the fluff I see, but more productively, I can spotlight the truth of God’s delight in those he has called and justified, and will one day glorify. I can be a marquee pointing to the gospel to help the hurting, wobbling women off their crutch of the man-centered, sin-minimizing perspective.

So when my sin condemns me (like the nasty sins of complaining, pride, and ungenteel speech I like to conveniently minimize in my own zealous way) I remember: in Christ there is no condemnation (Romans 8:1); I repent for God is rich in mercy (Ephesians 2:8); I am a new creation in Christ(2 Cor 5:17); and “when God rejoices in his creation, or even when he rejoices in us, it is really the reflection of his own excellent qualities in which he is rejoicing” (Grudem, 219) that dead, unholy, unworthy sinners are now completely righteous, pure, and justified in the blood of Christ Jesus our Lord.

There really is no better place to be than in Christ, and oh, how good it is to delight in and be delighted in by the Father (Psalm 84).

Jesus, Our Empathetic High Priest

The other day, I walked into my son’s room to see him holding his bloody hand in his blanket.  I panicked because I had absolutely no idea what had happened.  He plainly told me that he cut his hand on a broken piece of glass, but then (probably because I was freaking) he immediately started crying. But I mean the cut was significant, I thought we might have to go to the ER.  (Anyway, why there was even broken glass is a completely different story)

As I tried to help, Ezra fought me tooth and nail.  He didn’t want me to look at it, or touch it, or help him at all.  He didn’t even want a band-aid.  But I knew that cleaning it, wiping away the blood, applying pressure for a good long while, and putting a band-aid on it would really be the best thing for him, even though initially it would hurt.

He continued to fight me, and eventually I had to use a very stern voice and finagle my way around his squirming body.  Toddlers are strong y'all.  I asked him if he knew that mommy loved him.  I asked him if he trusted mommy.  Finally he relinquished control and let me help him. He looked at me, sighed, and  said “ahh, much better mommy”.

If me and you are Ezra, this is a picture of our relationship with God a lot of times. 

After a few minutes of having a paper towel and 3 bandaids (which were probably wrapped too tight) I asked him if he was okay & he said that he was.  He also said, “I am sorry I got cut.”  It wasn’t his fault that he got cut; it was just an accident.  But I was still there to help him with his cut, his injury, his boo-boo.

About 20 minutes after getting bandaged and back to playing with his trains, he looked at me and said “Jesus got cut too.”  Ezra wasn’t asking a question, it was just a statement that, in fact, Jesus had gotten cut before.  So right there, I thought of how Jesus probably did get cuts, and scraps, and boo-boos as a child, and his mom probably bandaged him a few times (except Jesus was super compliant and perfect and all, but still, in his humanity he felt all the physical pain of a boo-boo).

So I told Ezra that Jesus is our empathetic high priest. I know, I know, he has no idea what the words “empathetic” and “high priest” even mean, but it was a wonderful reminder to me that Jesus understands every thing we go through. From boo-boos to loneliness, and broken relationships and loss, Jesus understands.

Jesus, who was God in the flesh, became a human and lived a perfectly obedient life that we were meant to, but couldn’t because of our sin.  Any hardship or struggle we find ourself in in this broken world, Jesus can empathize because he suffered in the ultimate way—bearing the wrath of God on the cross, on our behalf because of our sin, our disobedience against a holy God.  

Jesus even understands the successes and victories, because he conquered death.  

When I told Ezra that Jesus understands the pain that he feels in his finger, I really meant it, Jesus does understand the pain that Ezra is experiencing right now because what could be more painful than absorbing all the wrath of God for all of mankind from past, to present and future.

So this is good news as we enter into this holiday season, or maybe for you tonight.  Because whatever hardship, frustration, pain you are facing, Jesus understands.  And I totally get that things might be smooth sailing and nothing is wrong, but something might happen soon, and you need to know that even then, Jesus understands.

Hebrews 4:14-16 says: 

“Since then we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.”

So Jesus, our high priest who has suffered on our behalf, can understand all our hurts and weaknesses and pains and struggles and temptations.  We can be confident when we call upon our God we will receive exactly what we need in these trying times.  

I don’t know what is going on in your life.  Things might be all around great, but they might not.  Chances are there are things through out the week that just don’t seem to work out the way you thought they would. 

So if you are in the midst of any type of physical pain, Isaiah 53 says that Jesus’s physical body was actually pierced for our transgressions and completely crushed for our iniquities. 

If you’re hurting from the loss of someone your love, remember in John 11 how that Jesus grieved and wept because his friend Lazarus had died.  

In 2 Corinthians 8,  Paul reminds us that though Jesus was rich, he became poor for your sake.  He became poor so you might be rich in him. So this is incredibly good news if you are feeling the weight of finances and struggling to see how ends will meet.

As I go through this list of real life situations, I am sure you can think of times in Jesus’ life that he would have experienced them: loneliness, abandoned by friends, betrayal, humiliation, physically violated, cheated, physical stress, excluded from things.

As Jesus experienced the greatest broken relationship in the world — being separated from the Father on the cross “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me” we can rest in the truth that because Jesus endured the separation and brokenness from the Father, we now can have a restored and whole relationship with God himself.

Jesus understands.  

Jesus is our great, empathetic high priest.  

Whatever strain in your life there may be—even a little boo-boo like Ezra—Jesus calls us to draw near to his throne, cast our cares on him because he cares for us, and he will give us his real grace in our time of need.  That is demonstrated by the cross.  Thank you for the cross.

What I Mean When I Say I am "Pro-Life"

When I say I am "pro-life," I literally mean I value life, ALL life, made in the image of God.  A life He fashioned for a purpose.  He desires ALL persons to turn to him. All, not just the persons that look similar to your reflection.

The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance.
- 1 Peter 3:9

And there is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved.
- Acts 4:12

I am pro-human; pro-unborn; pro-unsure pregnant mom; pro-poor; pro-wealthy; pro-refugee; pro-woman; pro-man; pro-LGBT; pro-enemy; pro-leaders; pro-police; pro-black; pro-white; pro-muslim; pro-christian. pro-LIFE. I am pro-PERSON.  I am "pro-life" because life is valuable in the eyes of our Maker.  We have value because of who created us.  Just like Starry Night is valuable because van Gogh painted it.  We are valuable because of who made us; and who made us is the great I AM.  From before the foundation of the world, he knew us and had us in mind.  As Jesus died on the cross, he had us in mind.  We are valuable because God says we are.  So from conception to resurrection, we are valuable and valued, all of us.  He created us in His likeness with dignity and purpose.

But now, O Lord, you are our Father; we are the clay, and you are our potter; we are all the work of your hand.
- Isaiah 64:8

When I consider Your heavens, the work of Your fingers, The moon and the stars, which You have ordained; What is man that You take thought of him, And the son of man that You care for him? Yet You have made him a little lower than God, And You crown him with glory and majesty!
- Psalm 8:3-8

Then God said, "Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness...God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.
- Genesis 1:26-27

Whether we agree with decisions made by such persons or even support the lifestyles choices of those persons is contrary to whether or not we re able to extend love in a Christ-like way.  Others' sins are not to hinder our ability to demonstrate Christ's love; for if this was the case, we would still be separated from the great love of Christ.  He sought us in our sin, loved us, pulled us out of that sin, and walks with us in the path of righteousness.   Agreeing or disagreeing with someone's life choices is separate from our ability to care and value their lives.  It is unrelated to our responsibility and ability to share the redeeming love and salvation message of Christ.  Disagreeing with someone's choices should not cause us to see them as less than human or unworthy of Christ's love.  Whether they run this country, are growing inside the womb, have broken relationships, are fleeing from an oppressive government, or practice a different religion; if we shut out those who differ from us, how can we possibly demonstrate biblical Love to our neighbors.

my friend Sepideh and her parents: all are Iranian refugees

And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.
- Mark 12:30-31

'For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.’ Then the righteous will answer him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?’ And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me. “Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.’ Then they also will answer, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?’ Then he will answer them, saying, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me.’ And these will go away into eternal punishment, but the righteous into eternal life.
- Matthew 25:35-46

But he, desiring to justify himself, said to Jesus, “And who is my neighbor?” Jesus replied, “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and he fell among robbers, who stripped him and beat him and departed, leaving him half dead. Now by chance a priest was going down that road, and when he saw him he passed by on the other side.  So likewise a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side.  But a Samaritan, as he journeyed, came to where he was, and when he saw him, he had compassion.  He went to him and bound up his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he set him on his own animal and brought him to an inn and took care of him.  And the next day he took out two denarii and gave them to the innkeeper, saying, ‘Take care of him, and whatever more you spend, I will repay you when I come back.’  Which of these three, do you think, proved to be a neighbor to the man who fell among the robbers?” He said, “The one who showed him mercy.” And Jesus said to him, “You go, and do likewise.
- Luke 10:29-37 

And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.
- Philippians 4:19

So when I say I am "pro-life," that is what I mean.





(updated from my original Facebook post)

Day 13 Idolatry + Day 14 Journaling

Today's scripture:
1 Chronicles 16:8-36

When you read the title of today's devotional, a few things might have run through your head.  Upon thinking about idols, you may have thought about the popular TV show American Idol.  Maybe you thought about the carved statues in East Asian religions.  Or perhaps you thought of your celebrity role model.  Regardless, you have a pretty good understanding of what idols can be and may be in your life.

After reading the passage in the Bible however, you might think that titling today "Idolatry" was odd.  True, this is song of thanksgiving from David. However, I think it is really important to note that David understood his place before God.  He knew God, and most importantly, he was known by God.

David refused to worship anything or anyone but the Lord.  In this song of praise, David shows so much adoration to our heavenly Father.  We can learn a lot from that.

When we have a grateful heart toward the Lord that pours out praise and adoration and thanksgiving, it enables us to have a proper posture before the Lord.  We cannot serve two masters as we looked at last week in Matthew (Day 3).  That means we cannot worship both God and something or someone else.  When you are ascribing glory to the Lord, thanking him for your salvation, remembering his great works, trembling before his throne, and seeking him continually; there is no place for worshipping a lowercase-g god.

Idolatry is the act of worshiping some thing instead of the one true God.  Anything is capable of becoming a god in our lives: marriage, money, children, cars, body-image, time, social media, food. 


Verse 11 holds the keep for us.

"Seek the Lord and his strength, seek his presence continually."

The Lord promises he will be found if you earnestly seek him (Matthew 7:7).


However, as it says in Psalm 115 (please please don't neglect this passage in your 'New Bloom' devotional), when we forgo the glory of Christ and glorify the man-made, the finite, we become as is our idol: worthless and useless, absolutely dead.

Worship the one true capital-g God.  He is worthy of our praise.  He never ends. He is not man-made. He is living. He sees.  He speaks.  He hears. And he is our empathetic Savior.  Abandon your idols, hold fast to Christ.

What tends to becomes an idol in your life? 

Do you lead a life of gratitude and thanksgiving to the Lord?

---

Day 14 is designed to let you reflect on this past week of scripture readings and questions. Revisit a verse that really stuck out to you.  Jot down a phrase with which you really connected.  Scribble a prayer of gratitude or repentance.  Ask Christ to give you a desire for more of him. However you choose to do use your quiet time, stay focused on your time with the Lord.


Love,

More from New Bloom:

Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4 | Day 5 | Day 6+7 

Day 8 | Day 9 | Day 10 | Day 11 | Day 12 | Day 13+14

If you have any questions, comments, concerns, likes or dislikes about the New Bloom devotional, I would love to hear your thoughts.  Leave a comment below and I will respond.  Thank you so much for taking this 2-week journey with me.  It has truly been an exciting adventure and I hope you grew in your walk with the Lord as much as I have.  I hope you have been encouraged in Christ these past 14 days.  

Day 10 Be Different

Today's scripture from the New Bloom devotional:

1 John 1-3

I am 27 years old and I literally just realized that the phrase "law abiding citizen" and "please abide by the rules" use the same word "abide" uttered throughout scripture, specifically 1 John.  Talk about a lightbulb moment.  To abide by the rules means to follow the guidelines set before you.  It means to stay within the confines of set boundaries. Likewise, abiding in Christ means to follow Christ's example, to remain in his teachings and commandments.

If you are like me, two words that may have jumped out at you more than any other words were "sin" and "abide."  These two words couldn't be more opposite.

In chapter 3 you see the phrases "practice of sinning" and "keep on sinning" repeated a number of times.  If you remember from Day 3 Freedom, we touched on this point.  I don't mean to simplify a sin struggle or distort the reality of habitual sin because I have been there and I know how binding it can be; however, scripture is clear that the love of sin does not rule in a believer's heart.  A heart surrendered to Christ cannot occupy both Christ and the love of darkness.  This is particularly challenging to me, and I don't want to seem like I have it "all together" in this life, so please don't read the following words as if I am on a pedestal.  It's just my wish to grow closer to Christ.

If you are walking in a state of habitual sin, it is impossible to walk in the light.  These are not my words, they're God's.  As a struggling 21-year-old college student living in habitual darkness and trying to walk in the light, it was evident that I was leading a double-life completely inconsistent with scripture.  I was living in rebellion, numb to the consequences of my sin, and far from the presence of Christ.  I knew who could rescue me from sin, yet I didn't truly want to be rescued.  I loved the darkness.  There is a distinct differences between being okay with your sin and hating it.  You can read more of that process here.

I am walking, living proof that darkness and light cannot coexist in one's heart; but I am also living proof that Jesus Christ is a merciful Savior who is ready and willing to forgive a penitent heart.

"Little children, let no one deceive you.  Whoever practices righteousness is righteous, as he is righteous."
-1 John 3:7

We will continue to sin in this world, but we need to ask ourselves if sin is the defining characteristic in our life.  Is our life outlined by habitually rebelling against what Christ commands?

If you don't know, ask yourself these questions:

• Is there something in my life that I know is sinful, but I don't want to give it up?
• Is there something that I keep going back to in order to be satisfied?
• Is there something that brings initial gratification, but leaves me completely broken?
• Is there something I know is wrong to do, but I do it anyway because I know Christ will forgive me later?

If so, you may be like 21-year-old me.  Trying to live a double-life, a fake-life.  It's time to be different, be made new in Christ. Christ is ready and willing to forgive your past, and give you a bright tomorrow.  Will you turn away from a lifestyle of habitual sin and turn toward to a life of righteousness in Christ?


Love,

Here is Sovereign Grace's "All I Have Is Christ."  This is a great song to listen to with today's devotional.  Check out more suggested songs in the back of your devotional.



What stuck out to you in the 3 chapters we read in 1 John?

What was your favorite verse from these passages?


More from New Bloom devotional:

Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4 | Day 5

Day 6+7 | Day 8 | Day 9

Day 6 Serve + Day 7 Prayer and Journaling

Serving is the definition of humility; however, if we are not careful we can get in the habit of serving for the wrong reasons or to solely make ourselves feel better.  Christ, God in flesh and eternal king, came to serve others.  This is completely opposite of what you would expect of a king (and what we see in culture).  He is a holy God, if anything we should be the ones serving him; yet, he came not to be serve, but to humble himself and serve others.  As Christ-followers, we are called to reflect his glory.  One surefire way of doing this is to serve others with a heart made righteous by Christ.

Humbling ourselves doesn't come naturally, or even comfortably.  Maybe it does to you, but having teeth pulled feels easier some days.

Today's passages:

Philippians 2:1-11
Ephesians 5:15-21
Galatians 5:16-26
Romans 12:9-21
Matthew 20:26-28

If I am honest with myself and honest before the King of kings, I would have to say my lifestyle tend to disagree more than agree with the following:

• I go out of my way to serve others
• I want to know Jesus more
• I submit to authority/others easily
• I believe others are worth my time
• I have the mind of Jesus
• Spiritually, I use my time wisely
• I demonstrate great self-control

And my heart tends more to agree with the following:

• I have a prideful spirit
• I get jealous easily

Now I don't know what number you gave yourself in the self-evaluation, but humbling ourselves starts with a right picture of who were without Christ and who we have been made to be in Christ.

Ephesians 2 tells us that without Christ we were dead and considered children of Wrath.  To quote Landon Dowden from a BSU sermon at Mississippi State, "When you're dead, you can't get deader than dead. "  Without Christ, we are dead.  A dead person can't do anything, but be dead.  There is no life within.  We were children of wrath, completely isolated from the great redeeming love of Christ.  As children, our father was not Christ, it was Satan.

But because of God's great mercy and incredible love, he rescued us out of darkness and became our Father.  We are now children of the Light.  If you are in Christ, you have no reason to boast because there is absolutely nothing that you did to deserve Christ's love.  You didn't jump high enough or have a good enough voice. You didn't give enough money or say enough kind words.  You didn't serve enough or make good enough grade on every test.  You can't do anything enough.  If you have submitted to the Lordship of Christ, it is because Christ so graciously opened your eyes to his majesty.  You did nothing to win his grace.  He bestowed that grace on you freely.  And because of his great redeeming work in your life, we are to demonstrate Christ's love to others by serving them.

I don't want to disagree with the points above.  I don't want to agree with the points above.  I have done an awful job at serving others and reflecting the salvation that Christ provides.

Tomorrow is Day 7 of the New Bloom devotional.  It is designed for you to have a quality prayer and journaling time.  If any specific thing resonanted with you and the season you may be in right now, I encourage you to go back to that scripture and write it down.  Commit it to memory. Mediate on it. Use it as a guide to pray.  Whatever you use Day 7 to do, the Lord is patiently waiting for you to call on him.  He has so much to say to you.


Love,

Will you join me in committing to serving others with a right heart?

How did you evaluate yourself?

How did these scriptures challenge you today?


Here is Sovereign Grace's "Behold Our God."  Find more great songs on your suggested song list in the New Bloom devotional.



For a recap of New Bloom week 1:

Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4 | Day 5

Day 3 Freedom + Video Introduction

Romans is my favorite chapter in the entire bible.  Reading it through this time, I found so many more things that spoke to me at this season in my life.  That is what I love about God's word: it is active and living and able to speak to you wherever you might be.  I hope as you complete Day 3 that you are able to hear from the Lord and apply his Word to your life.  

Take a minute to watch the short video below for additional scripture and a defining question to think about while you meditate on Christ's Word.



Romans 6
Matthew 6:24
John 8:31-38 

Additional verses:

2 Corinthians 5:17
Ephesians 4:1
Ephesians 2:1-5
Ephesians 4:22-24
Colossians 2:6-7
Colossians 3:12-13


Take a minute to listen to "No Longer Slaves" by I Am They from the suggested song list from the back of your New Bloom devotional. 




Don't forget to ask the Lord to reveal any sin in your life that might be hindering your relationship with him.  He knows we will struggle with sin for as long as we are on this earth, and Jesus still willingly laid down his life for you so that you would walk in the newness of life, forgetting the old.  Thanks be to God that he gave us a way to be forgiven and free from our sin through a relationship with Jesus.


Love,

cultural christianity

"the greatest single cause of athesism in the world today is "christians" who acknowledge him with their lips, but walk out the door and deny him by their life style.  that is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable." 
-dc talk

i have been thinking so much lately about what it truly means to be a christian.  if you don't know me, then you may not know that i don't consider myself a christian in the sense the world means christian.  i would rather refer to myself as a christ-follower.  though christian literally means "a follower of christ", i think the world "christian" has been watered down to be palatable to most everyone.

[start conversation] 

A: hey! who are you and what do you do? 

R: hi, my name is renee and i am a professional athlete.  

A: wow that is so cool.  tell me more. 

R: well, i have been running since i was in the 3rd grade.  it's more than a job, it's what i love. i have too many pairs of the exact same shoe and more spandex than a volleyball team.  you can usually catch me running around town at many hours of the day so just honk if you see me and i'll wave!  i even have a running blog to boast of my performances, do you want the link?   

A: oh i would love to check that out.  it must be hard having to be so dedicated all the time.  

R: well, yeah it is sometimes. i keep myself hydrated daily and carry around fruit-flavored water cause water sometimes gets boring.   i am religious about taking my iron so i stay at peak levels since i have chronic anemia.  i try to get 8 hours of sleep so my body properly recovers. i eat nutritious meals that help me recover.  i know it takes a lot of dedication to do what i do, but that's the life i love, and that is what it takes to be a professional athlete. 

A: that's awesome renee, can i see some race results or stats?

R: oh, i haven't run a race in a while, you know because i'm still training and making sure i am close to my PR, but i am a professional athlete.  you can google me to make sure if you don't believe me.  i know you have seen my running pictures and articles in the paper.  i am a professional athlete.   

A: oh yeah i will definitely look into that.  so who do you run for, like who are your sponsors and endorsements? 

R: i don't need sponsors.  i support myself.  oh my gosh, i am a professional athlete for crying out loud and don't lecture me on sponsorships.  i have been a professional runner for a long time, since i could basically walk. have you ever tried to run!?  i started running when i was in the second grade.  i can run a mile faster than you and 10 of your friends.  do you know how many pairs of running shoes i have owned in that time?  you asked me to tell you about me and i told you i was a professional runner and i am. why are you questioning me!? 

A: sorry, i just wanted to know a little bit more about you.  why are you getting so defensive.  i think it is cool you are a professional athlete, but you don't have sponsorships or any professional race results to actually prove that.  so basically me and could both be professional athletes at this rate. 

R: i'm done with the conversation. you are so ignorant.  you don't even understand.  i am a professional runner.  are you stupid or something? 

[end conversation]

now i know this is a ludicrous, and extremely prideful, conversation, but i want you to think about it for a minute.  can you relate to it?  replace professional athlete with "christian." now can you relate to it? yeah, if i'm honest, i relate far too well. 

all too often i see this reality in our world.  guilty, i stand here confessing to you that i throughout most of my life,  i professed to be a christian, while there was no action to back that supposed claim up.  i called myself a christian, yet i had nothing to show, no evidence, no proof of my transformation in christ.  i dotted my i's and crossed my t's on sunday, made sure i told God i was sorry and that i would try not to screw up the coming week, knowing very well the plans i wanted to carry out with no intention of serving christ.

christ himself is the evidence i need to be sure of my salvation, but if i am not actively living out that transformation, has there even been one? my heart breaks when i think of how many people thought i was a christian, and for them to witness the life i led.  to you, i'm sorry.  i became a christ-follower my senior year of college.  what you knew of me before is not an accurate reflection of the almighty jesus who transforms willing lives. what a poor example of christ i have been, and a huge turn off to those seeking refuge in the comfort of christ.

sure, i had a bible and had been baptized and went to church and youth camp and youth group and i volunteered and i said good things and memorized verses, but these were futile works, detestable works done in and of myself without the power of the lord working through it.  it all looked good, but was all in vain.  through all of this, there was still something missing: the true evidence of my heart being transformed by the gospel of jesus christ, the fruit of my salvation.  how can i call myself a christ-follower, if i'm choosing not to even follow the example he provided?

i stand here today, redeemed. no longer going through the motions of what america says a christian looks like, but viewing myself through the lens of christ .  i have surrendered my life to christ.  all i have is his.  i refuse to give into the cultural christianity around me, and i surrender this life to be used by christ for his purposes.

this might have been tough to read.  it was tough to write because of the reality of my actions before christ; however, i sit here before you, redeemed and forgiven by a loving and gracious God who desires nothing more than to have a personal relationship, not a religious self-serving relationship, with you and with me.  if you have been teetering on the sunday-fix, compartmentalized christian life, you're not alone.  there is refuge for you and forgiveness in christ.  come to him now.  he won't leave you the same.

have you ever gotten sucked up into american cultural christianity? 


♫ jesus, only jesus -matt redman ♫

audrey: my sister

meet my sister: audrey.

the name "audrey" means [noble strength].  i think that is such a neat way to describe her, for in christ she is an heir of God and has strength in all circumstances in christ.  

audrey surrendered her life to christ a few months ago.  as jesus does when you encounter the true, living God, audrey has been completely transformed.  i wanted to introduce her on my blog, because she has decided to start one of her own.  she blogs over at trembling before the king.  she is just learning the workings of the blogosphere but feels that the blog will be a good way for her to document her walk with christ and is easier to keep up with than traditional journaling.   please do make her feel welcomed!

audrey is my best friend and life-long sidekick.  rarely a day passes that we don't talk on the phone.  i have seen her at her best and also at her worst.  when you grow up with someone who is only 17 months to the day younger than you, that happens.  fortunately, our love for each other as sisters is not contingent on who we are or what we do.  

my sister is an encouragement to me, and her passion and zeal for the Lord is contagious.  her fire for the Lord reminds me that we have a mission here on earth as christ-followers.  it reminds me that our time is limited and that loving people is supreme in our day. 

audrey is a one of a kind daughter of the king, and i encourage you to read her story of redeeming love here. 

loosing air and my sin problem

while i write this blog, spontaneously as all my blogs tend to be, i am sipping on my morning coffee.  i was greeted this morning with a voicemail that said i would only have to work half a day due to a water main break.  that initially sounds incredible, but it's really more of an inconvenience because now one of my classes will be ahead of others.  regardless, i should welcome this change.  after all, i do have a lot to get done.

i was walking the halls this morning as a teacher stopped me. she asked if my car was the one with all the bumper stickers and the (expired) indiana license plate. proud of my silver bullet named Stella, i boasted a "yes!"  then she delivers me the news: "you have a pretty flat tire."  then i began to question her: was it just low or was it flat-flat.  she informed me that it was just low, but it's extremely low and i need to get it looked at as soon as possible.

(i just got a call on the phone that yet another teacher has noticed that my tire is flat.)

so where am i going with my tire loosing air?  how in the world could i possibly make an analogy of a flat tire to my walk with christ?

grab your java, let's mull over this for a few.

sin, it comes in many different forms, but it all causes one thing.  sin, the very thing we don't want to do and do it anyway, causes separation from christ.  it breaks a relationship, it causes guilt, it causes us to retract from the very thing we love.  sin deflates us.  when we let sin spin its nasty web in our lives, it becomes a habitual practice. we end up driving around our lives on flat tires, bending our rims, eventually unable to drive.  air had seeped out of my tire and was ineffective for the job it was to do. i am so grateful that my coworkers pointed out the flaw in my car. do i rejoice when someone points out the sin in my life? am i quick to thank them? or am i quick to jump on them providing excuses as to why i am sinning? am i quick to form a rebuttal comparing my sin to theirs?

"jesus answered them, 'truly truly i say to you, everyone who practices sin is a slave to sin. the slave does not remain in the house forever, the son remains forever.  so if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed'." -john 8:34-36

how foolish i would have looked had i told my coworker that her tires were flatter than mine, that she needed to mind her own business, that my tires don't concern her.  but don't we all do this with sin in our own lives?

Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. -philippians 2:3-4

i am at work, unable to leave.  i need to fix my tire but i am so helpless here at work.  i have to fix this sin problem, but fixing sin isn't a matter of changing behavior so you look the part.  every 20-something eventually grows up and puts their childish, wild days behind them.

so do i just take off work and go fix it myself?  do i wait, pray that everything pans out?  do i just hope that the tire survives with the remaining air?  do i just leave it as it, pretend like it never happened? i mean, after all, i CAN drive on it.  i got to work didn't i!?

fix.  i need a fix, a cure. help.

we've been down this road before.  you let a problem go without resolve and it gets worse.  sickness, bad relationships, flat tire, jobs.......sin.

fix.  i need a fix, a cure. help.

this is where my husband comes to the rescue in my tire situation.  mark comes to the school on wednesday's to help lead an FCA men's leadership group.  i told him what was going on with my car, even though i couldn't see my tire for what it really was.  i asked him to help me.  i asked him to pay to put more air in my tires. i was really helpless.  in a phase of waiting for mark to tell me my car was going to be okay. without hesitation mark, filled my tires.

so what about this sin problem?  how can i fix this sin problem that has plagued me for nearly 25 years?

...if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart one believes and is justified, and with the mouth one confesses and is saved." -romans 10:9-10

i tell jesus what is going on in my life, even though i can't really see my sin for what it really is.  i ask jesus to help me.  i ask jesus to pay the price for my sin.  and without hesitation, jesus says, i have already done so.  jesus paid the price to fix my sin when he died on the cross and rose victoriously over death.  confessing to jesus that he is lord, believing in jesus, trusting that jesus is your heart mechanic is the only way to fix this sin problem.  it was only when i acknowledged that air was leaking from my tires that anything could be done about it.  have you acknowledged your sin before jesus?  jesus will fill you, though air will continually leak out of my tires, though we will continue to sin on a daily basis, when you surrender you life to jesus christ, your past, present, and future sins have been paid for. confess to jesus, let him fill you.

romans 6 is my favorite chapter in the bible.

What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin that grace may abound? By no means! How can we who died to sin still live in it? Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death?  We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life.For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we shall certainly be united with him in a resurrection like his. We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin. For one who has died has been set free from sin. Now if we have died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him. We know that Christ, being raised from the dead, will never die again; death no longer has dominion over him. For the death he died he died to sin, once for all, but the life he lives he lives to God. So you also must consider yourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus.Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, to make you obey its passions. Do not present your members to sin as instruments for unrighteousness, but present yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life, and your members to God as instruments for righteousness. For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace.What then? Are we to sin because we are not under law but under grace? By no means! Do you not know that if you present yourselves to anyone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin, which leads to death, or of obedience, which leads to righteousness? But thanks be to God, that you who were once slaves of sin have become obedient from the heart to the standard of teaching to which you were committed, and, having been set free from sin, have become slaves of righteousness. I am speaking in human terms, because of your natural limitations. For just as you once presented your members as slaves to impurity and to lawlessness leading to more lawlessness, so now present your members as slaves to righteousness leading to sanctification.For when you were slaves of sin, you were free in regard to righteousness.  But what fruit were you getting at that time from the things of which you are now ashamed? For the end of those things is death. But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves of God, the fruit you get leads to sanctification and its end, eternal life. For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

have you surrendered control of your "loosing air" situation to jesus?
have you acknowledged your need for him to rescue you?
are you doing anything about the sin that someone has pointed out in your life?
are you being the friend and lovingly confronting someone about a sin you see destroying their life?
do you realize that without jesus, overcoming sin is impossible?
do you realize that sin is prohibiting you from being who God desires you to be and prohibiting you from doing what christ has called you to do?

stop leaking, ask jesus fill you.