Day 13 Idolatry + Day 14 Journaling

Today's scripture:
1 Chronicles 16:8-36

When you read the title of today's devotional, a few things might have run through your head.  Upon thinking about idols, you may have thought about the popular TV show American Idol.  Maybe you thought about the carved statues in East Asian religions.  Or perhaps you thought of your celebrity role model.  Regardless, you have a pretty good understanding of what idols can be and may be in your life.

After reading the passage in the Bible however, you might think that titling today "Idolatry" was odd.  True, this is song of thanksgiving from David. However, I think it is really important to note that David understood his place before God.  He knew God, and most importantly, he was known by God.

David refused to worship anything or anyone but the Lord.  In this song of praise, David shows so much adoration to our heavenly Father.  We can learn a lot from that.

When we have a grateful heart toward the Lord that pours out praise and adoration and thanksgiving, it enables us to have a proper posture before the Lord.  We cannot serve two masters as we looked at last week in Matthew (Day 3).  That means we cannot worship both God and something or someone else.  When you are ascribing glory to the Lord, thanking him for your salvation, remembering his great works, trembling before his throne, and seeking him continually; there is no place for worshipping a lowercase-g god.

Idolatry is the act of worshiping some thing instead of the one true God.  Anything is capable of becoming a god in our lives: marriage, money, children, cars, body-image, time, social media, food. 


Verse 11 holds the keep for us.

"Seek the Lord and his strength, seek his presence continually."

The Lord promises he will be found if you earnestly seek him (Matthew 7:7).


However, as it says in Psalm 115 (please please don't neglect this passage in your 'New Bloom' devotional), when we forgo the glory of Christ and glorify the man-made, the finite, we become as is our idol: worthless and useless, absolutely dead.

Worship the one true capital-g God.  He is worthy of our praise.  He never ends. He is not man-made. He is living. He sees.  He speaks.  He hears. And he is our empathetic Savior.  Abandon your idols, hold fast to Christ.

What tends to becomes an idol in your life? 

Do you lead a life of gratitude and thanksgiving to the Lord?

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Day 14 is designed to let you reflect on this past week of scripture readings and questions. Revisit a verse that really stuck out to you.  Jot down a phrase with which you really connected.  Scribble a prayer of gratitude or repentance.  Ask Christ to give you a desire for more of him. However you choose to do use your quiet time, stay focused on your time with the Lord.


Love,

More from New Bloom:

Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4 | Day 5 | Day 6+7 

Day 8 | Day 9 | Day 10 | Day 11 | Day 12 | Day 13+14

If you have any questions, comments, concerns, likes or dislikes about the New Bloom devotional, I would love to hear your thoughts.  Leave a comment below and I will respond.  Thank you so much for taking this 2-week journey with me.  It has truly been an exciting adventure and I hope you grew in your walk with the Lord as much as I have.  I hope you have been encouraged in Christ these past 14 days.  

Day 12 My First Love

Today's passages:

Revelation 2:2-7

Do you remember when you first surrendered your life to Christ?  The sweet wooing process of the Lord drawing you out of darkness and into his marvelous light.  Do you remember with what eagerness you dove into the bible to consume his Word?

It doesn't matter if you were saved when you were 6-years-old at Vacation Bible School or you were drug through the trenches before crying out to Christ later in life, you were dead in your sin but God in his great mercy opened your eyes to his wonderful salvation.  That is a beautiful picture.

You can read the messy but beautiful story of the Lord drawing me out of darkness here.

Nic Dampier Photography - March 8, 2014 - Starkville, MS

However, as we get more comfortable in our relationship with Christ, as with a significant other, we stop investing as much time with that person.  We might get lazy with intentionality.  We stop pursuing moments together and start figuring out what we can get from the relationship.  Unfortunately, those same principles can paralyze our walk with Christ.

Return to your first Love, the only Love that will never depart or fail.

Listen to I Am They's "From the Day" and return to your first Love.  Find a list of more suggested songs at the end of the New Bloom devotional.


More from the New Bloom devotional:

Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4 | Day 5 | Day 6+7 | Day 8 | Day 9 | Day 10 | Day 11

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Share your redemption story in the comments below.  We could all be encouraged by your testimony.

Day 11 Shhhhh.....

The average woman speaks nearly 20,000 words a day.  That's more than 13,000 additional words than the average man speaks each day.  And with the use of social media and the ease of hitting the "SEND" button, there are countless other words exchanged each day.  How are we using those words and what do those words say about who we are?

Today's scriptures:

Ephesians 4:29-32
Ephesians 5:4
Colossians 3:5-8
Philippians 4:8-9
James 1:26
Ecclesiastes 10:12-14

Clearly the Lord designed man and woman distinctly different in a myriad of ways, it just so happens that talking may be one of the most obvious differences character trait differences.  Sure, we all know men on the chatty side and women on the silent side, but this is talking about the majority of the population, regardless of religious affiliation.

So does this mean that we just need to put tape over our mouth and keep quiet for the rest of our lives?  Well, if your words are damaging to those around you then, yeah, maybe.  But no, there is something more edifying and God-glorifying.  God has shaped us quite uniquely as women, and we have an incredible opportunity to use those 20,000 words a day (or more) to influence and build others up.

When we use our words to tear down, to slander, to promote self, to curse others, it reveals a heart problem.

"For out of the heart the mouth speaks."
Matthew 12:34b

A sinful heart produces sinful words.  Sinful words are not attractive, not appealing, and definitely not appetizing for those receiving.  We are reminded in James 3 that our tongue is set on fire by hell itself.  We can begin by confessing how our words have been anything but God-glorifying and ask Christ to renew the words that are on our lips.

"Guard your heart above all else, for it effects everything you do."
Proverbs 4:23 (NLT, 97)

Christ is the only one who can soften our hearts of stone.  Instead of using our speech (and texts and tweets and posts) for temporary worldly gain, we can exchange them for eternal glory.  Philippians 4:8-9 says that we can think about everything that is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, and worthy of praise.  When we fill our hearts with these things, our speech begins to reshape.

Take a minute to listen to Bethel's "Ever Be."


As a follower of Christ, we are to look like Christ and when our conversations with coworkers, and tweets about politics, and group text messages with friends sound no different than non-believers, we literally waste the blood of Christ that he mercifully poured out for us on the cross.  Let the praises of Christ and a God-glorifying, positive message be on your lips at all times.  Walk (and talk your 20,000 words) in a manner worthy of your calling as Ephesians 4:1 describes.

Love,

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If you haven't downloaded the New Bloom devotional, you can do so by clicking the logo.

More from New Bloom devotional:

Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4 | Day 5

Day 6+7 | Day 8 | Day 9 | Day 10

Day 10 Be Different

Today's scripture from the New Bloom devotional:

1 John 1-3

I am 27 years old and I literally just realized that the phrase "law abiding citizen" and "please abide by the rules" use the same word "abide" uttered throughout scripture, specifically 1 John.  Talk about a lightbulb moment.  To abide by the rules means to follow the guidelines set before you.  It means to stay within the confines of set boundaries. Likewise, abiding in Christ means to follow Christ's example, to remain in his teachings and commandments.

If you are like me, two words that may have jumped out at you more than any other words were "sin" and "abide."  These two words couldn't be more opposite.

In chapter 3 you see the phrases "practice of sinning" and "keep on sinning" repeated a number of times.  If you remember from Day 3 Freedom, we touched on this point.  I don't mean to simplify a sin struggle or distort the reality of habitual sin because I have been there and I know how binding it can be; however, scripture is clear that the love of sin does not rule in a believer's heart.  A heart surrendered to Christ cannot occupy both Christ and the love of darkness.  This is particularly challenging to me, and I don't want to seem like I have it "all together" in this life, so please don't read the following words as if I am on a pedestal.  It's just my wish to grow closer to Christ.

If you are walking in a state of habitual sin, it is impossible to walk in the light.  These are not my words, they're God's.  As a struggling 21-year-old college student living in habitual darkness and trying to walk in the light, it was evident that I was leading a double-life completely inconsistent with scripture.  I was living in rebellion, numb to the consequences of my sin, and far from the presence of Christ.  I knew who could rescue me from sin, yet I didn't truly want to be rescued.  I loved the darkness.  There is a distinct differences between being okay with your sin and hating it.  You can read more of that process here.

I am walking, living proof that darkness and light cannot coexist in one's heart; but I am also living proof that Jesus Christ is a merciful Savior who is ready and willing to forgive a penitent heart.

"Little children, let no one deceive you.  Whoever practices righteousness is righteous, as he is righteous."
-1 John 3:7

We will continue to sin in this world, but we need to ask ourselves if sin is the defining characteristic in our life.  Is our life outlined by habitually rebelling against what Christ commands?

If you don't know, ask yourself these questions:

• Is there something in my life that I know is sinful, but I don't want to give it up?
• Is there something that I keep going back to in order to be satisfied?
• Is there something that brings initial gratification, but leaves me completely broken?
• Is there something I know is wrong to do, but I do it anyway because I know Christ will forgive me later?

If so, you may be like 21-year-old me.  Trying to live a double-life, a fake-life.  It's time to be different, be made new in Christ. Christ is ready and willing to forgive your past, and give you a bright tomorrow.  Will you turn away from a lifestyle of habitual sin and turn toward to a life of righteousness in Christ?


Love,

Here is Sovereign Grace's "All I Have Is Christ."  This is a great song to listen to with today's devotional.  Check out more suggested songs in the back of your devotional.



What stuck out to you in the 3 chapters we read in 1 John?

What was your favorite verse from these passages?


More from New Bloom devotional:

Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4 | Day 5

Day 6+7 | Day 8 | Day 9

Day 9 Not My Plan

Today's verses:

Isaiah 55
Romans 8:15-30

Lots of things happen in life that aren't in our plan.  It can be everything from big events like sickness to small things like a car accident.  We all have these things in life that just aren't "planned" by us.  For me, six separate injuries in college athletics weren't exactly planned, both pregnancies weren't planned, and moving to Virginia wasn't necessarily the plan; but in all and through all, God was faithful and provided and it was for my good and for his glory. 

What are things in your life that weren't in your 5 to 10 year plan but ended up being for your good and for God's glory?

My best friend was getting married in a matter of hours and I was so excited to get to stand next to her on her big day as a newlywed myself.  Mark and I had made a 2-hour trip to Memphis, Tennessee for a late afternoon wedding.  As we finished up the girly pre-wedding festivities, I called my husband to make sure he knew what time to be at the venue and how to get there.  About 30-45 minutes before the wedding started, Mark called me to tell me that the car was overheated and he couldn't drive but 30-seconds at a time.  He was all the way across an unfamiliar town, and there was no way he was going to make it to the wedding.

He finally made it to the wedding, but he missed the ceremony and almost all of the reception.  The hot, southern, summer day turned to a humid, thunderous, rainy night in a hurry.  My car's radiator hose was busted.  It was 10 at night.  How in the world were we going to get back home!?

We had no other option but to call a tow truck and ride the 150 miles home to Starkville, Mississippi in the cab with our driver.  This was not how I wanted to spend the night of my best friend's wedding.  I didn't want to deal with my car.  I didn't want to pay the expensive repair bill.  All I could do and that point was cry.  I was overwhelmed.  It was not what I wanted, nor was it what I have expected.  It was inconvenient and frustrating.

But even in this God was working.

Mark reassured me that God would take care of us.  Mark reassured me that this was an opportunity to glorify him.  Mark reminded me that God was in control and that he saw us in our distress.  Mark reminded me that God was at work despite the situation. (By the way, ladies, marry a man who is more concerned with the things of the Lord and how to give glory to Christ than whether or not his night is ruined by uncontrollable circumstances.)

So Mark started the conversation with our driver, realizing that she probably didn't want to make the long trek either.  We used this opportunity to ask about her.  She loved this.  Our driver had a pretty tough life.  We talked with her the entire way back, and I was just trying not to fall asleep.  Mark shared the gospel with her.  We finally arrived in Starkville and parted ways after praying with our driver to have a safe trip back to Memphis.

Even though the night hardly went as desired, God was working; and God used us; and God took care of us.

God promises that for those that love God, the out of reach circumstances in life are for our good and for his glory.  In the midst of the chaos with the car and the rain and making sure my best friend got off to her honeymoon, it didn't seem like any good could come out of it.  But it did.  And when it didn't seem like God could be glorified in the situation, he absolutely was.

Oh, and guess how much we had to pay for my car to get fixed?  The repair bill was $463.11, but what you don't know is that we had $463.10 left over from our wedding budget.  God provides, especially when you are faithful to your calling.  We paid one penny for a ride back to Starkville and an opportunity to share the gospel with an unbeliever.  I can't make it up.  This is when you get to see your faith grow and are reminded that God is truly in control.

Look for opportunities to make the most out of terrible situations.  It will be for your good and God's glory.

Love,

Take a minute to listen to All Sons & Daughters' "Called Me Higher." You can find more great songs at the back of your New Bloom devotional.



How can you trust God at his word that your good and his glory will result from an unexpected circumstance?



For more on New Bloom:

Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4 
Day 5 | Day 6+7 | Day 8

Day 6 Serve + Day 7 Prayer and Journaling

Serving is the definition of humility; however, if we are not careful we can get in the habit of serving for the wrong reasons or to solely make ourselves feel better.  Christ, God in flesh and eternal king, came to serve others.  This is completely opposite of what you would expect of a king (and what we see in culture).  He is a holy God, if anything we should be the ones serving him; yet, he came not to be serve, but to humble himself and serve others.  As Christ-followers, we are called to reflect his glory.  One surefire way of doing this is to serve others with a heart made righteous by Christ.

Humbling ourselves doesn't come naturally, or even comfortably.  Maybe it does to you, but having teeth pulled feels easier some days.

Today's passages:

Philippians 2:1-11
Ephesians 5:15-21
Galatians 5:16-26
Romans 12:9-21
Matthew 20:26-28

If I am honest with myself and honest before the King of kings, I would have to say my lifestyle tend to disagree more than agree with the following:

• I go out of my way to serve others
• I want to know Jesus more
• I submit to authority/others easily
• I believe others are worth my time
• I have the mind of Jesus
• Spiritually, I use my time wisely
• I demonstrate great self-control

And my heart tends more to agree with the following:

• I have a prideful spirit
• I get jealous easily

Now I don't know what number you gave yourself in the self-evaluation, but humbling ourselves starts with a right picture of who were without Christ and who we have been made to be in Christ.

Ephesians 2 tells us that without Christ we were dead and considered children of Wrath.  To quote Landon Dowden from a BSU sermon at Mississippi State, "When you're dead, you can't get deader than dead. "  Without Christ, we are dead.  A dead person can't do anything, but be dead.  There is no life within.  We were children of wrath, completely isolated from the great redeeming love of Christ.  As children, our father was not Christ, it was Satan.

But because of God's great mercy and incredible love, he rescued us out of darkness and became our Father.  We are now children of the Light.  If you are in Christ, you have no reason to boast because there is absolutely nothing that you did to deserve Christ's love.  You didn't jump high enough or have a good enough voice. You didn't give enough money or say enough kind words.  You didn't serve enough or make good enough grade on every test.  You can't do anything enough.  If you have submitted to the Lordship of Christ, it is because Christ so graciously opened your eyes to his majesty.  You did nothing to win his grace.  He bestowed that grace on you freely.  And because of his great redeeming work in your life, we are to demonstrate Christ's love to others by serving them.

I don't want to disagree with the points above.  I don't want to agree with the points above.  I have done an awful job at serving others and reflecting the salvation that Christ provides.

Tomorrow is Day 7 of the New Bloom devotional.  It is designed for you to have a quality prayer and journaling time.  If any specific thing resonanted with you and the season you may be in right now, I encourage you to go back to that scripture and write it down.  Commit it to memory. Mediate on it. Use it as a guide to pray.  Whatever you use Day 7 to do, the Lord is patiently waiting for you to call on him.  He has so much to say to you.


Love,

Will you join me in committing to serving others with a right heart?

How did you evaluate yourself?

How did these scriptures challenge you today?


Here is Sovereign Grace's "Behold Our God."  Find more great songs on your suggested song list in the New Bloom devotional.



For a recap of New Bloom week 1:

Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4 | Day 5

Day 5 Love

The scriptures for today:
Psalm 107
Romans 5:8
1 Corinthians 13

Love is a pretty incredible thing.  We get to extended it to our spouses, our friends, our families, and coworkers.  However, our society seems to be obsessed with the idea of love, but not willing to commit to love or even sacrifice for love.  We are surrounded by ideals of love and ideas of what would make someone love expertly.  Don't believe we are frantically searching for love and obsessed with it?  Look at your TV.  Almost every TV show idealizes or glamorizes the worldly concept of love in romance and friendship.

But what does God's infallible word say that love is?  How can we know if we are loving others in a godly way?  How can we know that God is absolutely for us and wants the best for us? 

This answer can be found in a supplemental scripture for today's devotional: 1 John 4:7-21

I count at least 29 "love" words in just a few short verses.  If you haven't read this passage, go read it now.  It will truly comfort your heart.

God is love.  It is who he is.

So in 1 Corinthians 13, we can replace love with God.  God is patient, and kind, and rejoices with truth.  God doesn't envy, or boast, or rude.

We get to see in Psalm 107 how, despite their constant rebellion, God loves his people actively.
He delivers, he leads, he satisfies, he fills, he brings, he shatters, he sends, he heals , he changes, he blesses, and he rescues.

And despite our constant rebellion and chronic sin nature, God actively is pursuing us in love.  He is waiting for us to surrender our lives to him so his love may be perfected in us.

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Be renewed by the words in "Come Behold the Wondrous Mystery" by Matt Papa.  Find more great songs at the end of your New Bloom devotional.



Love,

How has today's study on biblical love impacted you?


For more:

Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4

Day 4 The Word

Today's passages are:

Psalm 139:23-24
Psalm 119

There are only two passages to read today; however, Psalm 119 is the longest book in the entire bible.  It is longer than some books in the bible.  Take time to really read through all 176 verses in Psalm 119 and let it transform your thinking today.

Psalm 119 "reflects the view that the Lord, who abounds in steadfast love and faithfulness and who therefore freely and fully forgives his people when they confess their sins, loves his people without limits, and therefore also guides the faithful in the way of life that is genuinely good and beautiful." 
(from ESV study bible notes)

Psalm 119 illustrates that if you meditate and walk steadfastly in obedience to the Lord's commandments, you will not easily forget them or go astray.


Did you know that you can listen to the bible being read out loud?  I encourage you to listen to Psalm 119 as someone else reads it and you follow along.  It's incredibly powerful to just listen to scripture.

Take a minute to listen to Bethel's "I Will Exalt."  You can find more encouraging songs at the end of the New Bloom devotional in the suggested song list.



What is the one word or phrase you are taking from Psalm 119 and meditating on today?

For me, it is "steady my steps" in verse 133.  I pray that as I meditate on the Lord steadying my steps, that I would be able to resist temptations and sin that it would have no dominion over me as I walk in the statues of the Lord.


Love,

If you have not had the chance to download the New Bloom devotional, you can download it by clicking on the logo.

Day 3 Freedom + Video Introduction

Romans is my favorite chapter in the entire bible.  Reading it through this time, I found so many more things that spoke to me at this season in my life.  That is what I love about God's word: it is active and living and able to speak to you wherever you might be.  I hope as you complete Day 3 that you are able to hear from the Lord and apply his Word to your life.  

Take a minute to watch the short video below for additional scripture and a defining question to think about while you meditate on Christ's Word.



Romans 6
Matthew 6:24
John 8:31-38 

Additional verses:

2 Corinthians 5:17
Ephesians 4:1
Ephesians 2:1-5
Ephesians 4:22-24
Colossians 2:6-7
Colossians 3:12-13


Take a minute to listen to "No Longer Slaves" by I Am They from the suggested song list from the back of your New Bloom devotional. 




Don't forget to ask the Lord to reveal any sin in your life that might be hindering your relationship with him.  He knows we will struggle with sin for as long as we are on this earth, and Jesus still willingly laid down his life for you so that you would walk in the newness of life, forgetting the old.  Thanks be to God that he gave us a way to be forgiven and free from our sin through a relationship with Jesus.


Love,

Day 2 High Priestly Prayer

If you have not downloaded your FREE copy of New Bloom, I encourage you to do that by clicking the New Bloom logo on the sidebar.

This is supplement to DAY 2: THE HIGH PRIESTLY PRAYER.  I have walked through the questions relating to the passage John 17.

Take a moment to listen to Phil Wickham's version of the "Doxology."  You can find more great songs from the suggested song list at the back of your New Bloom devotional.

John 17 is known as the high priestly prayer.  These verses make it clear that the only way to know God is to to know Jesus.  Jesus prays for himself, his followers, and also those who will believe in him in the future (us).

After reading John 17, I went back and looked for everywhere the words "give" or "given" where written.

God has given Jesus:

• authority on earth. (verse 2)
• the power to give eternal life 
• the people who will believe in him (verse 2)
• Everything is given to Jesus (verse 7)
• the name of God because he is God himself (verse 11)
• the glory of God (verse 24)

Jesus gives us:

• eternal life (verse 2) 
• the words from the Lord (verse 8, 14)
• the glory of God when we surrender our lives to him (verse 22)
• himself in the name of God (verse 26)  

"I am praying for them.  I am not praying for the world, but for those whom you have given me, for they are yours.  All mine are yours, and yours are mine, and I am glorified in them." John 17:9-10

Jesus is praying for those that already trust him with their life.  He isn't praying for the world, those that won't repent and follow him.  While Jesus desires that everyone would follow him, he knows that there will be some people who still refuse to bow their knees to him on this earth.  If you are a Christ-follower, Jesus is praying for you!  You are Jesus's and therefore you are God's.  The end of verse 10 makes me think, "Does my life glorify the Lord?  Does what I say, how I act, the way I treat others, and the way I repent of sin glorify Jesus?"

I am glad that Jesus is praying for us, he intercedes on our behalf.  

Intercede means to intervene on another's behalf.  It means to act or interpose in behalf of someone in difficulty or trouble.  It means to plead or petition.  It means to act as a mediator.  It means to reconcile differences.  It means to interpose a veto.

That means that Jesus is going before the God of the universe on our behalf!  Jesus is praying-to God-for us.  He is making our prayers eloquent, what they should be in the first place.  He reconciles us with God.  He is praying that his will, whatever is best, be done in our lives.  He vetoes our request and does his will as he sees fit.

While hard to swallow at times, how incredibility comforting it is to know that Jesus, the one who loved us so much he died in our place, is going before the Great I AM on our behalf!  If that doesn't blow you away, are you even breathing?

Jesus asks the Father to:

• keep believers, to preserve them in their salvation until Christ's return (verse 11)
• specifically protect from the enemy (verse 15)
• sanctify Christ-followers in truth (verse 17), this means that Jesus is praying that our walk with him would grow closer to him each day, and that we would walk and live in his Word daily
• unite believers so that other people would surrender their lives to Christ (verse 21), we are to be one just as Jesus and the Father are united

If I am honest, verse 14-16 stirs a variety of emotions.  It really makes me anxious because it is not fun to be hated by other people, but it is comforting because if Jesus was hated for standing on God's Word and biblical principles and abhorring sin, then I am in good company.  I am not of this world and that makes me happy because all I see in this world is division and corruption and hatred.  It is so good to know that my home is not this earth.

As a Christ-follower, I am sent into the world.  Meaning I am to go and share the incredible, most wonderful news of Christ to those around me.  What am I doing about that?  Most days.....I am not.  There are two people in my life that God has specifically shown me to with whom I must share the gospel, and each chance I get in person, I do commit to that.  I can't say that it is easy, or comfortable, or even fun.  But every time I walk away with an invigorating sense of awe and wonder at the Lord.  My faith is grown out of my obedience. And it allows me to marvel at the Lord even more.

I am so glad we have a mighty Savior who is constantly intervening on our behalf.

How did today's High Priestly Prayer devotion go for you? Let me know in the comments below.  I can't wait to grow more with you over these next 2-weeks.


Love,

Day 1 Tough Times

Habakkuk 3:17-19
Psalm 9
Luke 1:46-55
Psalm 35

As you might know, I am a mom of a one-year old son and will be welcoming a daughter into our family sometime in January.  There is so much chaos that just happens once you become a mom, that I never before understood, respected, or appreciated.  Moms have a tough job.  My difficult time right now is that I don't know how to be a mom and a wife and a friend and do it all well. I am consumed by my selfishness and ever so aware of my lack of sleep.  It sounds incredibly horrific to type this out, but I need to, for accountability.  I hit a wall.  A mental break down.  I was "done" mom-ing. I feel like a failure.  A lot of the times nothing I try to fix a situation helps, and if it does help, well I go about it in the wrong way with the wrong attitude.  I am really bitter about "losing" my old life in Starkville, or not getting to "do" the things I wanted to do before having kids.  Of course I know I have a wonderful life here in Virginia and my son is one of the most special gifts I could ever have; but, I lost it.  I worked myself into a mental break down.  That is my tough time. And I'm not handling it in a very Christ-centered way.

After reading these verses of people going through difficult times (exile, oppression, slander, unknown future, people hating you), it is clear that I am not responding to this situation how I should.  Mary rejoices and gives thanks. The psalmist rejoices in the God of his salvation and continues to seek the Lord.  Habakkuk trusts that God will make him surefooted even though circumstances are crumbling around him.

They aren't like me.  Whiney, bitter, faithless me.  Scripture is a good mirror, but sometimes your reflection isn't beautiful.

I really like Psalm 9:10.  It says,

"And those who know your name put their trust in you, for you, O LORD, have not forsaken those who seek you."  

Seeking the Lord allows us to rejoice in our trials.  Even though I struggle to find the silver lining at a 2AM baby scream-fest, I can know that through it Christ is shaping me to be more like him.  And like Habakkuk, I can rest in knowing that the Lord is my strength, he is my salvation, and my worth or goodness or ability to be a mom or any other thing is not rooted in my circumstances.

God is the provider of salvation. The rescuer of those who trust in him. He is strength. He is the deliverer.  He is great. He is righteous.  He acts in his own timing.  He is a listener.  He sees us.  He is holy. He is merciful to those who fear him.  He is mighty. He is the exalter of the humble.  He is the preserver of life.

The way I am choosing to handle my current situation (albeit might seem small in comparison to others' struggles), doesn't reflect I trust Christ.  I am not giving God the glory through my trial, though he doesn't need me to give it to be glorified.  He is glory.  I am not relying on Christ to be my strength, plain and simple.

There are plenty of examples in my life where a situation or circumstance has resulted in God's glory and it was definitely for my good (even if it was painful or not initially satisfying).

• Breaking up with a boyfriend
• Being injured in college athletics six times
• Following my parents advice
• Removing myself from a friend group

All of them, though uncomfortable or heart-breaking, resulted in God drawing me closer to himself.  It just took lots of hoops, bells, and whistles to get me there.  For that, I wouldn't change any of those circumstances, because nothing is more important than being drawn closer to the feet of Jesus.  So likewise, in the mess of my current circumstances, I need to stop and thank the Lord, because however exhausting and draining and frustrating and seemingly impossible it is, I know Jesus is desiring to draw me to him and teach me to be more like him.

Take a minute to listen to the song from Shane and Shane "Though You Slay Me" and marvel at the sovereignty of our Lord through tough times.  You can find more great songs from the suggested song list in the back of your New Bloom devotional.

How did these verses speak to you today?

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