A Wedded Reminder

12.27.2014 | 4 comments

I am sitting at a beautiful book store dubbed coffee shop in Tuscumbia, Alabama. It's called Cold Water Books.   We are in this town because, today we get to witness one of my husband's friend get married to his beautiful fiancĂ©.  Mark is a groomsman in the wedding.

Getting to go to rehearsals, rehearsal dinners, and weddings is a beautiful reminder of what marriage is truly all about.


MARRIAGE is a daily reminder to me that we are all imperfect people in need of grace from our spouse.

MARRIAGE is a daily reminder that there is no way that i can fulfill every thing that my spouse wants or needs.

MARRIAGE is a daily reminder that there is a longing in my soul to be loved and to be cherished.

MARRIAGE is a daily reminder that i am far too self-consumed.

MARRIAGE is a daily reminder that MARRIAGE is not about me and it is not about my spouse.

MARRIAGE is about surrendering and committing your life to your spouse, forever and ever regardless of situations.

MARRIAGE is about the beautiful reality that jesus loved us so much that he laid his life down for us, the most perfect husband.

MARRIAGE is about seeing ourselves the way christ sees us: spotless, blameless, walking down an aisle in pure white to meet him.

MARRIAGE is a daily reminder that in our imperfections and short-comings and self-centeredness, that we have a savior that desires to love us and forgive us and be with us forever and ever, with not even one promise broken, to fill every longing heart, regardless of who we are or what we have done.

MARRIAGE: we are the bride of christ.


Last night a man was giving a speech to the soon-to-be newlyweds.  What he said really stuck with me, as tears filled my eyes.

"May the gospel always be as beautiful as [the bride] is walking down the aisle in that moment.  may the gospel always be as strong and sturdy in your life as [the groom] is standing there waiting for you at the alter. "

As you walk through marriage, or into marriage, or confused in marriage, or just patiently waiting for marriage, may the gospel be represented in your life.   


how to share the gospel

12.18.2014 | 2 comments

if you are anything like me, there is a deep-seeded desire to share the good news of jesus setting us free in his substitutionary death on the cross.  i want to share the good news that i no longer have to sulk in my misery, i no longer have to "try" to do good things and "earn" God's approval.  i don't have to do religious activities to save me, jesus saved me when i surrendered my life to him.  no longer is it me in control of what tomorrow brings, but jesus.  how freeing.  so there is this desire; however, there is a real fear that paralyzes us and prevents us from doing so.  this paralysis is not permanent, in fact, it only exists theoretically.

"we are free to choose but we are always a slave to our greatest desire." -jonathan edwards

but if it is only a theoretical paralysis that prevents us from opening our mouth to utter the life saving words to the world around us, why is it so real?  why can't i do it? what am i afraid of?

i have to ask myself these questions any time i go home. sharing the gospel, for me, is hard, and intimidating, and i let the fear of the unknown get the better of me.

you see, jesus has called me to share the gospel with my family who has all the amazing qualities to be warriors for jesus.  but my family lacks jesus.  they lack the hope of tomorrow, they lack the freedom found in christ, they are slaves to themselves.  i was this way, my whole life, and then jesus found me and opened my eyes.  i want them so desperately to experience this.

over thanksgiving break i made it my mission to share.  this wan't easy, it wasn't a fun waiting period, it was awkward, and i was terrified in so many ways.  i was going to talk about jesus to my family.  a mission trip to home.  (isn't every where we go a mission field though?) i knew the Lord would use me and he would speak through me, but obediently opening my mouth is another thing.

so i started with audrey, my sister who surrendered her life to jesus only a few short months ago.

i got to spend an entire day with my mom at the nail salon and shopping.  i got to ask her where her relationship with christ stood.  my mom is growing day by day in her relationship with jesus, but i know there is still something holding my mom back.

then i talked to my grandma (mom's mom) and found out that though she had a relationship with jesus as a child, her passion for him has remained in spiritual infancy.  i got to open the bible with my grandma and read her some verses.  this was encouraging.

finally, i got to talk to my grandpa (my dad's dad).  i simply asked, after building up fictitious responses and letting fear nearly overcome me in my head, "grandpa, what do you think about jesus?"  his response blew me away, "well, if he is not the Son of God, then we are all screwed."  this lead us into a deeper conversation about my grandpa's childhood and early married life.  i was left in tears. without going into detail, my grandpa had been burned, actually marred, by the church.  to know my grandpa had been ripped apart and scarred so badly by people who claim to love jesus broke my heart.  not once, but twice.  with tears welling in my eyes and a lump forming in my throat from trying to keep it together, i apologized for them, and let him know that that is not what following jesus in a relational way looked like.

my mission isn't complete.  the bible calls us to make disciples.  each person has to respond to jesus. it's still hard for me.  it's still awkward. it's still a struggle of my own comfort verses other's eternal destination.  it's a struggle of obedience.  it's a struggle and i am in no way boasting in sharing, but boasting only in the fact that sharing the gospel with 3 people over christmas break is due to the power of jesus working in me.  i need his power in me.  i need your prayer that my fear of the lord would over power the fear of the unknown.


"how much do you have to hate someone to believe that having everlasting life is possible and not tell them about it?" -atheist penn jillete




i want to share with you verses that walk through the gospel.  one of the ways that gives people a clear response to jesus, not you, is to walk through scripture and let them know what jesus has said. walk through these verses in order.  they tell the beautiful story of the everlasting hope we have in jesus.  

for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. -romans 3:23

for the wages of sin is death but the free gift of God is eternal life in chrsit jesus our lord. -romans 6:23

we are justified by his grace as a gift through the redemption that is in christ jesus. -romans 3:24

and you, who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made alive together with him having forgiven us all our trespasses by canceling the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands.  this he set aside, nailing it to the cross. -colossians 2:13-14

therefore, if anyone is in christ jesus he is a new creation.  the old has passed away, behold, the new has come.  all this is from God, who through christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation.  therefore, we are ambassadors for christ, God making his appeal through us.  we implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God.  for our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.  -2 corinthains 5:17-21

in the days of his flesh, jesus offered up prayers and supplications, with loud cries and tears, to him who was able to save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverence.  although he was a son, he learned obedience through what he suffered, and being made perfect, he became the source of eternal salvation to all who obey him. -hebrews 5:7-9

now the lord is the spirit, and where the spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. -2 corinthains 3:17

for God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. for God did not send his Son in to the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.  whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only Son of God.  -john 3:16-18

whoever recieves his testimoney sets his seal to this, that God is true.  for he whom God has sent utters the words of God, for he gives the spirit without measure.  the father loves the son and has given all things into his hand.  whoever believes in the Son has eternal life; whoever does not obey the Son shall not see life, but the wrath of God remains on him.  -john 3:33-36

"...today, if you hear his voice do not harden your hearts." -hebrews 4:7

"jesus said to him, "i am the Way, the Truth, and the Life.  no one comes to the father except through me." -john 14:6

"and he said to all, would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me." -luke 9:23-26





so again, i want to ask you the same question i have to ask myself, "how much do you have to hate someone to believe that having everlasting life is possible and not tell them about it?"


i'd love to hear about a time you shared the gospel with someone and their response to it.  i;d love to hear what id holding you back.  i'd love to hear your thoughts on this post. i'd love to hear about how your relationship is going.  i'd love to hear your questions about jesus.  i would love to just hear what is on your heart after reading this.  



cultural christianity

12.06.2014 | 1 comment


"the greatest single cause of athesism in the world today is "christians" who acknowledge him with their lips, but walk out the door and deny him by their life style.  that is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable." 
-dc talk

i have been thinking so much lately about what it truly means to be a christian.  if you don't know me, then you may not know that i don't consider myself a christian in the sense the world means christian.  i would rather refer to myself as a christ-follower.  though christian literally means "a follower of christ", i think the world "christian" has been watered down to be palatable to most everyone.


[start conversation] 
A: hey! who are you and what do you do? 
R: hi, my name is renee and i am a professional athlete.  
A: wow that is so cool.  tell me more. 
R: well, i have been running since i was in the 3rd grade.  it's more than a job, it's what i love. i have too many pairs of the exact same shoe and more spandex than a volleyball team.  you can usually catch me running around town at many hours of the day so just honk if you see me and i'll wave!  i even have a running blog to boast of my performances, do you want the link?   
A: oh i would love to check that out.  it must be hard having to be so dedicated all the time.  
R: well, yeah it is sometimes. i keep myself hydrated daily and carry around fruit-flavored water cause water sometimes gets boring.   i am religious about taking my iron so i stay at peak levels since i have chronic anemia.  i try to get 8 hours of sleep so my body properly recovers. i eat nutritious meals that help me recover.  i know it takes a lot of dedication to do what i do, but that's the life i love, and that is what it takes to be a professional athlete. 
A: that's awesome renee, can i see some race results or stats?

R: oh, i haven't run a race in a while, you know because i'm still training and making sure i am close to my PR, but i am a professional athlete.  you can google me to make sure if you don't believe me.  i know you have seen my running pictures and articles in the paper.  i am a professional athlete.   
A: oh yeah i will definitely look into that.  so who do you run for, like who are your sponsors and endorsements? 
R: i don't need sponsors.  i support myself.  oh my gosh, i am a professional athlete for crying out loud and don't lecture me on sponsorships.  i have been a professional runner for a long time, since i could basically walk. have you ever tried to run!?  i started running when i was in the second grade.  i can run a mile faster than you and 10 of your friends.  do you know how many pairs of running shoes i have owned in that time?  you asked me to tell you about me and i told you i was a professional runner and i am. why are you questioning me!? 
A: sorry, i just wanted to know a little bit more about you.  why are you getting so defensive.  i think it is cool you are a professional athlete, but you don't have sponsorships or any professional race results to actually prove that.  so basically me and could both be professional athletes at this rate. 
R: i'm done with the conversation. you are so ignorant.  you don't even understand.  i am a professional runner.  are you stupid or something? 
[end conversation]

now i know this is a ludicrous, and extremely prideful, conversation, but i want you to think about it for a minute.  can you relate to it?  replace professional athlete with "christian." now can you relate to it? yeah, if i'm honest, i relate far too well. 

all too often i see this reality in our world.  guilty, i stand here confessing to you that i throughout most of my life,  i professed to be a christian, while there was no action to back that supposed claim up.  i called myself a christian, yet i had nothing to show, no evidence, no proof of my transformation in christ.  i dotted my i's and crossed my t's on sunday, made sure i told God i was sorry and that i would try not to screw up the coming week, knowing very well the plans i wanted to carry out with no intention of serving christ.

christ himself is the evidence i need to be sure of my salvation, but if i am not actively living out that transformation, has there even been one? my heart breaks when i think of how many people thought i was a christian, and for them to witness the life i led.  to you, i'm sorry.  i became a christ-follower my senior year of college.  what you knew of me before is not an accurate reflection of the almighty jesus who transforms willing lives. what a poor example of christ i have been, and a huge turn off to those seeking refuge in the comfort of christ.

sure, i had a bible and had been baptized and went to church and youth camp and youth group and i volunteered and i said good things and memorized verses, but these were futile works, detestable works done in and of myself without the power of the lord working through it.  it all looked good, but was all in vain.  through all of this, there was still something missing: the true evidence of my heart being transformed by the gospel of jesus christ, the fruit of my salvation.  how can i call myself a christ-follower, if i'm choosing not to even follow the example he provided?

i stand here today, redeemed. no longer going through the motions of what america says a christian looks like, but viewing myself through the lens of christ .  i have surrendered my life to christ.  all i have is his.  i refuse to give into the cultural christianity around me, and i surrender this life to be used by christ for his purposes.

this might have been tough to read.  it was tough to write because of the reality of my actions before christ; however, i sit here before you, redeemed and forgiven by a loving and gracious God who desires nothing more than to have a personal relationship, not a religious self-serving relationship, with you and with me.  if you have been teetering on the sunday-fix, compartmentalized christian life, you're not alone.  there is refuge for you and forgiveness in christ.  come to him now.  he won't leave you the same.

have you ever gotten sucked up into american cultural christianity? 


♫ jesus, only jesus -matt redman 






audrey: my sister

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meet my sister: audrey.

the name "audrey" means [noble strength].  i think that is such a neat way to describe her, for in christ she is an heir of God and has strength in all circumstances in christ.  

audrey surrendered her life to christ a few months ago.  as jesus does when you encounter the true, living God, audrey has been completely transformed.  i wanted to introduce her on my blog, because she has decided to start one of her own.  she blogs over at trembling before the king.  she is just learning the workings of the blogosphere but feels that the blog will be a good way for her to document her walk with christ and is easier to keep up with than traditional journaling.   please do make her feel welcomed!

audrey is my best friend and life-long sidekick.  rarely a day passes that we don't talk on the phone.  i have seen her at her best and also at her worst.  when you grow up with someone who is only 17 months to the day younger than you, that happens.  fortunately, our love for each other as sisters is not contingent on who we are or what we do.  

my sister is an encouragement to me, and her passion and zeal for the Lord is contagious.  her fire for the Lord reminds me that we have a mission here on earth as christ-followers.  it reminds me that our time is limited and that loving people is supreme in our day. 

audrey is a one of a kind daughter of the king, and i encourage you to read her story of redeeming love here


why don't we pray

12.03.2014 | 5 comments

if God is all-sovereign, what is the purpose of prayer?

i've thought about this question before and many times i pay the question no mind.  i never stop to think
about the power of prayer.  prayer is an integral part to a communion with the father.  prayer is a communication outlet to my heavenly creator where i can pour out my hearts to jesus with out fear.  prayer is an opportunity for an intimate relationship with God.  prayer is a way i get to experience the overwhelming power of God in my own life.  prayer is a way of building a stronger connection with our ultimate Lover.  prayer demonstrates that i have faith in christ, that i trust the Lord with my lives which he so graciously has given me.  prayer demonstrates that i have relinquished control to the Father. so why don't i pray?

jesus prayed to the Father on several occasions, and if it was important for jesus to communicate with the Father, why do i not make it more of a priority to talk with my Lord?

Luke 6:12

One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to God.

James 5:16

Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
how is your prayer life?

if i am honest with myself my prayer life exists at meals, before intimidating conversations, when i need something, and a quick 2-minute prayer before school with a few high school students. i want my prayer life to be better.  i want to have a set aside time where it is just me and jesus talking.  i want to hear from God.  i can want to have a better prayer life all i want, but without actually making it a priority and follow through, i will always fail to tap into the overwhelming power and joy of jesus.

Psalm 145:18

The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.

1 Chronicles 16:11

Look to the LORD and his strength; seek his face always.

this month of december i am challenging myself to a 31-day prayer challenge.  every day, i am challenging myself to wake up early, grab a cup of coffee and my bible, read a proverb corresponding to the day, and spend time in prayer with jesus before work and the daily grind.  

.  
are you wanting to take this challenge with me? it's never too late to start!  

Colossians 4:2

Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.

Romans 8:26

In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.


i can't wait to see how my reverence and awe and love for christ explodes this month.